No. I don't know how to cook. Please don't judge me. I'm learning now and that's all that matters. My father, ironically, is one HELL of a good cook and has been (out of necessity) since he was very young. After all these years, I'm now tapping into his gastronomic brain trust....and learning how to cook.

 

In baby steps. And I will share my recipes, in "Michelle Wolfe Speak" as I go. That means everything will be easy enough for a culinary idiot like myself to understand. Remember, I never learned to cook....seriously. I'm a complete newbie.

I decided to share this embarrassing adventure with you, as I can only assume that I'm not the ONLY chick on the planet who never needed to learn how to cook. Dad says start with something easy, that you like to eat and something that's hard to f*** up.

So I picked bruschetta. Here's how I did it: (Level of Difficulty: 1/ Level of Personal Success: 8.)

  • 2 tomatoes
  • 1/4 white onion
  • 2 large cloves shallots
  • 1 clove garlic
  • 5 leaves of basil
  • Extra Virgin olive oil
  • Balsamic vinegar
  • Sea Salt/Fresh ground black pepper

Chop everything up. Throw into a glass bowl. Coat with Balsamic vinegar and olive oil (more balsamic than oil). Sprinkle with salt and pepper to taste. Serve on toasted French Bread points. Doesn't get ANY easier than that.