According to a new study, the length of your fingers says a great deal about who you are as a person. Finger length also determines if you’ve got the proclivity to be an alcoholic.

“German researchers recently studied 131 patients detoxing from alcohol addiction and compared their hands to those of 185 “healthy volunteers.” The ratio between the length of the index and ring fingers “was lower in the [alcohol addicted] patients,” according to Johannes Kornhuber, director of the psychiatry clinic at the University of Erlangen-Nurmberg.”

And all this time we assumed alcoholism was based on heredity and the bottle specials down at the local pub. It’s dependent on the length of the fingers. So how does a person figure out if they are indeed going to be, or currently are, a drunk? It must have something to do with how many drinks a person can hold in one hand right?

“Measure your fingers from the crease they make with the palm to the top of the digits — if the index finger is shorter than the ring finger, you might just have a higher chance of becoming an alcoholic.”

Ok, so we’ve all got to measure the index finger and ring finger, so flatten out the hand and OH MAN WE DROPPED OUR BREAKFAST BEER! Now there is nothing to wash down our morning slice of rum cake. This day is just getting worse. Just as long as it’s better than yesterday, most of which is a blur. What were we talking about? Oh right, the Germans.

[NY Post]