You think Courtney Stodden got married too young? She’s an old maid compared to some brides.

An eight-year-old girl in India has gotten divorced from her 14-year-old husband after they married when she was four.

The girl’s father gave her away as part of an arranged marriage with a then-10-year-old boy, even though marriages in the country are not legal between people under the age of 18.

It seems the bride’s dad came to his senses when the boy recently showed to take his wife. (“Take” his wife? To where? He’s 14. The mall on the handlebars of his Schwinn?)

The father embraced a moment of clarity in explaining the need to take care of his little girl:

I finally realized that this practice of marrying off daughters so young was wrong and that she should have a childhood, and that it was my duty to provide that.”

Unfortunately for him, the groom’s father didn’t share the same sentiment and the two got into a war of words, which ended when the bride’s daddy filed for divorce.

The bride’s father also said, “Social pressures are high in our village. But the marriage has been annulled. I have admitted it was wrong to marry her off so early. I now want to make things right. I want to give my daughter a good childhood. I will do everything to protect her.'

Of course, there are several unanswered questions now that the couple has split. Was there a prenup? Who keeps the fine china? Who retains custody of the teddy bears? Will she refer to her ex in court documents as “poopy head?”

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